this one is for girls…

…and this one is for boys

Wife: “There’s trouble with the car. It has water in the carburetor.”
Husband: “Water in the carburetor? That’s ridiculous.”
Wife: “I tell you the car has water in the carburetor.”
Husband: “You don’t even know what a carburetor is. Where’s the car?”
Wife: “In the swimming pool.”

A customer walks into a Trabi dealer.
Customer: “I want a Trabi with a two-tone paint job.”
Dealer: Yes, sir! It also comes with a turbocharged engine, antiskid braking, radial tires and a Blaupunkt stereo.
Customer: You’re joking.
Dealer: Well, you started it!

Q. Do you know what is the hardest part of learning to ride a bike?

A. The pavement.

A man was driving down the road in the country. He looked over and saw a baby pig in the field. He stopped and picked up the pig. He was driving around town with the pig in the car and a cop sees him and pulls him over.

Cop asks “Hey, What are you doing with that pig in the car?”

The driver says “Well, I just found the pig beside the road in the field.”

The cop says” I want you to take that pig to the zoo!”

The driver agrees he will take the pig to the zoo.

The next day the cop sees the guy driving around again and pulls him over. “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO TAKE THAT PIG TO THE ZOO!!”

He replied, “Well I did take the pig to the zoo. We had such a good time we are going to the ball game now.